nickelodeon

dear blog,

ever since nickie moved out, the house has been noticably tidier. and i don't think it is because nickie is a slob and took her slobbish tendencies with her. im pretty sure it is just because there is one less person living in this house. it is so weird how just one person leaving changes the whole dynamic to a household. physically, our house is different, but emotionally and socially our family is different too. two sisters is so much less than three. and the thing is, i miss nickie so much, but i have probably seen her more since she has moved out than i did when we lived under the same roof! on saturday night maddie and carly and i went to see her at her apartment and she was busy playing games with her roommates and boys and she couldn't even be bothered to stop and spend time with us. and while i probably would have done EXACTLY the same, it still hurts my feelings that she doesn't miss me the same way i miss her. and then on sunday we had a family dinner at gma and gpas in springville and nickie came, but she left early and we went to get the car from her and she was obvioulsy upset about something and when i tried to comfort her/have her tell me about it, she threw the keys in my face and ran inside. i need to just get over it and let her be on her own, but i just don't want her to get hurt, or mess up, or sleep through a class, or flirt with the wrong boy, or get embarrassed, or make any of the mistakes that i have already made! i know that this is a ridiculous and unreasonable notion, and i've made a goal to not call her every time i am in provo (which is a lot,) but is it wrong if i still try to protect her a liiittle bit?

sigh, this is actually not at all what i intended to write when i started writing this post, but i guess this is what is on my mind.

love,
rochelle

p.s. despite her smothering problems (guilty,) health problems (nose bleeds!) and roommate problems (i want to know who DOESNT have roommate issues,) i really think she is loving it. look how HAPPY she looks!